Accepting and Embracing Change in Your Life
I lost my water bottle. Change was bound to happen after that, I had to accept and embrace this change in my fortunes or go under.
I know it is really no big deal as it’s just a little thing – but I really liked that water bottle! It fit perfectly in the cup holder of my car, it had an easy to open lid, a spill guard that made it easy to drink out of and it was decorated with some cool stickers that really spoke about me that I’d acquired over the 3 years I had used it. I drink a lot of water and I carried it with me everywhere. My water bottle was very personalized and I was quite attached to it, I did not want to change it and I most certainly did not want to accept and embrace it.
Of course it also didn’t help that I only very rarely lose things. I can probably count on one hand the number of significant items I’ve lost in the last 5 years. Though not highly materialistic I am usually quite attentive to my material possessions and do not misplace them often. So I was a little confused and a little disturbed when I realized my water bottle, a very important part of my life, was missing.
Change is an interesting process. Psychologically speaking it goes like this: Pre-contemplation, Contemplation, Determination, Action, and Maintenance. But it’s more than just a process of decision making and taking action. Change is an emotional journey.
PRE-CONTEMPLATION OF CHANGE
At first I kind of stumbled around for a couple of days thinking it would just “show up” somewhere. I back tracked my path since the last time I knew I had it and checked in with the places I had been (at least 6.) One person even had a recollection of seeing it there at some point, but it was still nowhere to be found. I pined about it for days! I was struggling with letting go of my attachments to this old water bottle. I was feeling lost, sad, disappointed and, well, thirsty. I was going through an emotional process of change, understanding and release – not sure whether I could make it and not sure I was willing to accept and embrace the loss of the water bottle yet.
CONTEMPLATION OF CHANGE
Finally though, after almost 2 weeks, I came to grips with the fact that it was lost and not coming back acceptance at last. Surely I had left it in a coffee shop somewhere and without my name or number on it someone had very likely picked it up and taken it home with them. I realized that holding out hope that the old water bottle would magically reappear was resisting the truth of reality and change. It was time to accept that I needed a new water bottle. I almost felt like I was grieving the loss of one of my most important possessions. The process of grief is long and challenging as well. Pile that on top of the emotions of change and I felt like I was spinning.
I know this seems like I am making a mountain out of a mole hill, but change can be difficult for me – which is ironic given my life and profession. So often my life is a constant vortex of shift and change and evaluation and growth as I navigate my personal and professional world. I am constantly supporting others in the process of change and growth and discovery. I often can’t help but accept that change into my own life and that’s not even to mention the areas I’m doing my own change and growth work on a continual basis. As a result, I work hard at embracing stability in my life in other ways and sometimes that is accomplished with the little details and the tangible objects. So letting go of the lost water bottle represented a big challenge for me.
DETERMINATION TO CHANGE
When I finally accepted that it was time to purchase a new water bottle a very subtle change occurred for me. I realized that there was an opportunity here. My old water bottle was made of plastic that scientists say have health concerns. I had known this for a while but wasn’t quite ready to embrace the consequences of letting go of it. What I realized was that there was an opportunity to change and make a new and healthier choice. Not only had I made the decision to accept the change but I’d taken a step up to move forward in the process of change with new ideas, new information and a new sense of ownership.
This was perhaps the most important part of the change process for me. Embracing change can be as simple as making a simple choice between two rather irrelevant options or it can be as complex as shifting behavior patterns or beliefs. In this critical stage of change is an opportunity to make critical shifts. The stage of determination is where we can have the largest impact on our lives.
Whenever the opportunity for small change arises we also often have an opportunity to make a large shift in the direction of our choices. Think of it in terms of navigating a plane. At the start of a long flight a directional difference of just a few degrees can result in final destination hundreds of miles apart! The ways we choose to engage shift along with change can make the difference between health and happiness in the long run – or not! I chose to accept the shift to health and happiness this time.
So I did some research and determined what I wanted. A quick trip to the outdoor store and I had exactly what I was looking for – a large, metal, wide-mouthed new water bottle! Emotionally I had reached a place of empowerment. I knew what I wanted and I had acquired it. When I bought the new water bottle I felt really good about the choice I’d made. But my process of accepting change wasn’t over yet.
After just a few days of using the bottle I realized just how clean it was compared to my 3 year old plastic bottle and how much cleaner it was than my other old easy plastic straw water bottle that I used when I was at home. I have been a big water drinker for many years, but recently I have had trouble drinking as much water as I was used to largely, I think, due to the taste transfer in the bottles I had been using. So I started using the metal water bottle all the time. Once I accepted this switch over my water consumption started to dramatically increase and I felt healthier and more hydrated than I had in months. That was entirely unexpected.
A little thing like a different water bottle was affecting my health. A simple choice to change from a plastic to a metal was having a deep impact on my life. What I began to realize was that while my focus is often on large changes such as healing old relationships, changing my behavior emotional patterns, career shifts, understanding new and powerful differences in using language, etc. I almost never focus on the little details of how my daily life happens. It’s almost as if I’m so acclimated to big change that the acceptance of little changes somehow gets lost in the mix.
The truth for me was that sometimes the most subtle change in my life can be one of the most important. Maintaining my health is strongly linked to how much water I drink. So although it might seem like something really little, it in fact has a huge impact on all of my life. The healthier I am the more active I am. The more active I am the happier I am. The happier I am the more I attract the activities and people I want in my life. So something as simple as how much water I drink could affect my overall happiness if it produced a significant enough change in my body – just like navigating a plane.
Understanding the difference between little and big changes, how challenging or important they were and how they affected me made all the difference. What had seemed like it might be a mountain out of a mole hill was actually a small volcano. Sometimes it is the embracing of little things that make for big changes and I had found one of them!
Change Your Life in Just 5 Days
Have you ever woken up hating yourself?
Maybe you remembered how you upset or lied to someone you love? Or maybe you didn't do what you promised to do? Or maybe you just feel that you are just plain useless at everything? Would you like to change?
Have you ever woken up feeling scared!
Maybe you're scared of going to the office because you have to accept a colleague who dislikes you or maybe you have to fire somebody today. Or you have to present the sales figures (poor) to your boss?
Have you ever woken up wishing?
Wishing that you could change for the better, were better looking or slimmer or younger. Or maybe wishing you could afford to own the kind of home you were in last night or the car you saw in their drive?
Have you ever woken up feeling hate for everybody?
Hating the people who just seem to sail through life getting everything they want: the right job, the right home and the right kids. The people, who always change to the best jobs, always have plenty of money and get on great in any social situation.
Have you ever woken up feeling frightened?
Maybe about getting old or sick or that you are changing a relationship. Maybe frightened about how you are going to pay the mortgage or your credit card bills. Or maybe about those sales calls you have to make if you want to keep your job?
Have you ever woken up feeling that the whole world is against you?
No matter how hard you try nobody will help you or allow you to succeed nobody cares about you! Well let me tell you something, you are not alone. We all at some time or other have those feelings. I personally spent years just living and wishing for change and getting nowhere.
But, then I found something. A System that literally changed my life in 5 days! It was 5 days of hard work and I had to accept some hard choices, but after that it became easier and it gets easier with each day that passes. It's a System so simple to accept that anyone can operate it. Using it will give you every change you ever truly wanted be it wealth, health, love or happiness. It has given me the home I truly wanted the job I truly wanted the car I wanted and the money I wanted. And best of all it has given me a loving wife to embrace and share it all.
Here are a few of the things the System has thought me which might help you also.
You could try to stop worrying about and accept that there are things you can't change and use the time saved to think about things you can change.
You could try to stop reading newspapers and watching the News on TV for a while. Use the time saved to think about changing your immediate world and your place in it. Remember, the News Media are in the entertainment business and their idea of entertainment is "gloom and doom... Try seeing them as the guy who shuffles along the sidewalk with the billboard saying, "The end is nigh!"
You could try staying away from "losers" the people whose talk is always negative. Who always see the bottle as half empty? You could try to look at the positive side of everything. Because everything has a positive. It's a hard thing to do, but if you try to seriously think about a thing you may find a lot of your "problems" may actually change into opportunities.
Try listening to and embracing music that gives you a lift. Watch TV or go to movies that make you laugh and feel good. Try complimenting people. If you like what a person is wearing or the car they're driving or the service they've given you tell them so. I guarantee you'll feel better and they will too.
Look in the mirror and compliment yourself. Think about it. If you are taking notice of these suggestions it means you seriously want to embrace change. So compliment yourself for that reason if nothing else! You could try having patience with people. Accept that they may not be as good or as quick as you at doing things. You could also try having patience with yourself as well. Change your perspective on life, accept and embrace it.
You could try and find some project you truly believe in and get really involved in it.
You could try and relax more. You will find you can actually do things better the more relaxed you are. Remember YOU are always in control of your own thoughts and no one, repeat, no one, can do your thinking for you.
These are just a few of the things I have learnt from the System. As I said, using it has changed my life and has provided me with something that I consider to be priceless.
That is Happiness 99% of the time. I am still working on the other 1%